Venting. feel free to skip :)

For those of you who, for some reason decided to read this, don't know why I have the need to vent. Well, I'm helping watch a bossy, yet cute, 4 yr old and a smart, yet blonde, 6 yr old while Momma Jay is in Africa. Until April 6th!!!!

Before I start I must add that between all of the fun stuff, I was cleaning and doing dishes and laundry. Because I'm nice like that. And I got occasional, out of the blue, messages from Jaime everyday which kinda reassured me on why I was doing all of this and that I could do it. She just took weight off my shoulders when she talked to me (she don't know it though).

So, Day 1: Went better than expected. No crying. No attitude. Completely held together, even happy to say "Mommy is in Efiopia!" I laid in bed with Keagan til she was asleep and then a very worn out Miss Ashley hit the hay at like 8 something haha crazy. I know. Nothing really major happened ( that I remember). After all I had woke up at 1 to say bye to momma.

The emotion (from me) on Day 1: It's never easy to let someone you really care about leave to go far away for a long time. But I managed. Hugs goodbye (a couple cause I knew I wouldn't get any for a while) and "I love you"s.

 Then I made myself not watch her walk out the door (that's the hardest part). I'd say I was only sad because she was leaving but I'd be lying. I was also sad because I wasn't going. I miss the great people I met over there. I miss the smell, the weather, the views. Oh the views!!!! It was also hard for me because the whole first day she was on a plane so I didn't get to talk to her. I'm Keagan's comfort but Momma is mine. 

Day 2( first day back to school since mommy left): Early mornings suck! Mamo was up and ready and watching for the bus half an hour before it was expected. Oh that boy. Keagan was up all night the previous night (sorry Drew) so she was sooooo not ready for school. After the kids were gone I got motivated to write my previous blog. Keagan came home and we watched some Spongebob and snuggled. Mamo came home and did homework and what not. Then we all went outside

Mamo showing off his Ethiopian skills

 Keagan posing pretty for Mommy.

Mamo's idea of a good picture for Mommy.

 and played a nice game of basketball and soccer. We might have even played them at the same time. We are not normal after all :) Then the best part came....... are you ready? We watched Puss in Boots!!!!! Yeah I was a bit excited for that. Little ones go to bed and big ones play. Well watch Mirrors actually. Got scared (tired was our excuse) and went to bed. Oh and while we were outside I took a nice little video of the little ones telling mommy they miss and love her.

2 days down and the kids aren't the only ones excited ;)

Emotions Day 2: I started missing Africa more than I was missing Mom. lol. For the few of you who have been there, you understand. Don't you? I was jealous. I was envying the ones that got to go. I started thinking about my favorite place, Abel's balcony at night. It's beautiful. The place where it seemed like the rushing stopped and I got to stop and spend time with Mom. We didn't talk much there but it didn't matter. The scenery spoke for us. Hopefully she thinks of those nights while she's there now.

Day 3: Another early morning. Keagan stayed home because the bus didn't run today. Got to deal with her needy, bossy little butt. lol. Played outside and watched some more Spongebob. Mamo came home and homework and stuff. Then outside we went. Because it's nice and the kids need to lose their energy if I plan on keeping up. Currently we are all eatiing pizza and guess what....... watching Spongebob. Got a message today from Mom wanting to Skype tomorrow :) Kids in bed and Miss Ashley following.

Emotions of Day 3: Seems like everyday I think of something different. Today my focus was on Twinkle. That's not his name but he's a little boy I connected with at an orphanage on my trip. We call him Twinkle because he had a little toy that sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star when you would squeeze it. Twinkle couldn't squeeze it hard enough so he had me doing it. Repetitively.

 (This isn't my picture but I chose it because I had the same hair tie on my wrist that he played with)

He held my hand the whole time I was there. He would rub it and then hold it between both of his. Precious.

Day 4: Woke up and checked my phone. Text from Mom :))) Boys got ready fine. Keagan, who had stayed up late watching a movie with Daddy, was tired and making every excuse to stay home. "I have a funny taste in my mouth and my tummy hurts." She even used the excuse "That toothpaste was hot." After all was said and done, she didn't get her way and went to school. I was a slacker today and didn't do much cleaning. I'm gonna make up for it while the kids play outside. Just when I thought I was gonna lose my mind.

Mamo: Miss Ashley can I have some crackers?

Me: Yeah. Sure buddy. I'll get ya some.

Mamo: Thank you! You are so nice!

Me:Your welcome...........*speechless*

Is this how being a parent is? When you are bout to hang the kids by their toenails, they do something sweet. Like pick you a flower.

Daddy Drew came home and I let him have control while I got my break and finished watching Mirrors with Cole. Actually finished it this time. Got a call from Uncle Barry. Then bed

Emotions of Day 4: Haven't talked to Mom today. Probably won't seeing as how it's 1am there. This may sound weird but I feel way more down and stressed since I haven't talked to her. I honestly don't know why either. Call from Uncle Barry kinda helped my day. Just little things like that make my day.

Day 5: Got woke up at 2am by Keagan,
 "Miss Ashley...... Miss Ashley...... We forgot to mark off the calenderrrr."
"We will do it in the morning. Like actual morning. Go lay with Daddy"

Then the storm woke me up. CRACK BANG BOOM. yeah. the good stuff.

Got up with the kids getting ready for school and me and Keagan marked off the calendar. Kids are at school so I took a shower. Was sittin on my bed and the lights went out, thunder cracked and sounded like the house was gonna cave in. Lights came on and I went downstairs. It started hailing. Jeez it's gonna be a long day. Keagan is home and it's still storming. Packing clothes for the weekend cause the kids are headed to Mamaw's!!!! And Ashley is headed home for the weekend. Well around 5:30 but still. I'm excited. I feel slightly bad being excited to go home but after a long week, I need some quiet :) I won't be updating the weekends unless it's one we all stay home. Which is possible.

Emotions of Day 5: My relaxer today is music.

And Dr Phil because he just happens to be on TV at the moment. Seems like the days are going slower than molasses in January. Not this January because it wasn't cold. But a normal January. Gotta keep telling myself. " Ashley you go home tomorrow night and you are gonna get some you time and see some people who are gonna make you forget about it all and enjoy yourself." I have definitely learned a lot this week. Like how I thought Mom was already my Hero, but after I have done what she does all the time, She's definitely stronger than I had thought. She's like superwoman. And she told me I will understand why she takes so many baths. Well I have. Hot showers are my favorite thing right now. Me time :)

*insert weekend fun here.*

BTW, I recieved a message from mom over the weekend :))))) They had been in Dessie and were back in Addis for a while. Then back to Dessie to start the safe house!!!

Day 9:  Wake up, kids ready for school, kids on buses. The usual morning that I'm sure you are tired of hearing. Another hot shower :) And some quiet time before the crazy one gets home at noon.Keagan came home, cartoons. Mamo came home, homework then outside. Neighbor kids came over and played. Had grill food for dinner :) We sat together and ate while watching Two and a Half Men. Yeah, family time. Kids in bed and I lay down and watch Swamp People on my iPod :)

Emotions: I had realized the weekend definitely helped me get back to normal. I kinda took some weight off my own shoulders by not pushing myself to do a million things at once. I let the house get a little dirtier than last week and I ignored the 5 year old coming out in Keagan. That helped a lot.

Day 10: Got woke up at like 4 by my phone. "Jaime Glandon posted on your timeline." :) Talked to her for a sec and then fell back asleep. Slept in just a bit more than I usually so. I feel much better though. Not tired and wore out like normal. Kids off to school. And I'm just relaxing. It's gonna be a hot one again today :( Was 80 degrees IN THE HOUSE last night.Keagan is home and she's been running around with daddy. She smells like the outside :) Mamo will be home soon and I've been given the duty of picking Cole up from track. Then maybe I'll talk him into taking the kids to the park. Enjoy the weather. Oh yeah, Happy Spring! Picked Cole up from track. Took kids to park. Too full. Took kids to BK with a play place. Kids are showered and ready for bed :)

Emotions: I had a relaxing day and enjoyed taking the kids out and about. I don't really have much to say right now. Brain overload

Day 11: The safe house in Dessie is accepting girls!!!!!! They will now have a home, a bed, food and clean water. How awesome is that?! I'm done posting the whole morning routine because it's always the same. Kids are home and little Miss Keagan is seeing how far she can push me. She is in her room and quiet so I'm worried. I'm gonna start reading Eat Pray Love. Wish me luck. Maybe I'll finish it before Mom gets home.The kids got to go to the neighbors house for a little. I relaxed and talked to some very important people. We had pizza and then watched tv til bed time. Another 80 degree night so I didn't get much sleep.

Emotions: I've decided it's hard to blog when the kids are home or awake. And I've decided I don't want a girl. They are so stressful. I thought today was gonna be a "Sad Free Day." Well it's not. I miss my momma. :( As I fight tears, I laugh. I have her emotions. :)

Day 12: Woke up to a few things from Mom. Hopefully Skyping with her sometime today. She leaves for Dessie tomorrow. The rest of the team landed there today :) The kids got to go to a birthday party and they had a bast in the bouncies. While Cole, Drew and I had fun in the arcade :) Didn't get to skype with mom :(

Emotions: They were completely crazy. Was really emotional with missing mom and all. Was nice getting out of the house though.

Day 13: Keagan didn't have school today so we goofed off outside and I let her go picture crazy. Mamo is home and doing homework. We will be venturing out to pick Cole up from track soon. Then when Drew gets off at 7, I'll be heading home.

Oh wow. Where do I start?

I took a break. I'm back now though. So all is well. It is now Day 19. I came back yesterday. Nothing exciting. Back to the routine.

Day 19: School for the kids. Small break for me. Then to Keagan's school for some Kindergarten thing. I spent time with my best friend during that. A texted my new Aunt Layla all day which is freakin sweet! Drew a buncha pictures. Kids run around outside. Pick Cole up. Eat leftover pizza. Back outside.


For those of you who actually read this, I'm not gonna be posting anything for a while. Nothing to be said really. Mom comes home friday and I'm very happy about that. So for now, Fair well my blogger pals. 

'Why?' 'Why not is a better question'

People always ask us,

 "Why do you do it?" 

(Their kids are their pride & joy, but should they have to harm themselves to take care of them?)

Well let me make the situation easier for you to understand. 

Many of you know at least one of the members of the BEMM team (if you don't, you should).

Well imagine THEY were one of the mothers in the sponsorship that BEMM helps. 

(some of the mothers in the sponsorship.)

Homeless, jobless and with a child or maybe many. 

Now imagine them selling their bodies to random guys just so they will have money for their kid's next meal.

Would you want someone you care about going through that?

 I would hope not.

 ( They belong to Him, not them.)

But neither do we. 

We care about these mothers and our BEMM members. 

 Neither should have to go about their lives in this manner. 

If the BEMM team was stuck in Africa, in the same position as these mothers, would you try to help? 

Or would you just ask us, 

"Why?"

If you answered "try to help" well I'll show you how. 

Click the link below if you would like to donate to BEMM.

http://becauseeverymothermatters.com/to-donate 

Click the link below to go to the BEMM Facebook page. Like them and check out how they are doing

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Because-Every-Mother-Matters/106700199371912

And if you aren't convinced yet, I'll let David use his powerful words now.

This guy is amazing. 

I gave my best and that's the best I have.

 

 

Essay I wrote for my English final exam

The topic for the essay was an event in our life that has significantly changed who we are. Knowing me, I was beyond excited for this to be the topic. I could write a lot with it. It's not much but I was very proud of myself.

 An event in my life that has significantly changed who I am is when I went to Africa. On November 18th, 2011 I flew to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia with a close friend. Up until this point in my life I had never done anything or went anywhere that took me out of my comfort zone. This trip ended up changing me completely. I went from never traveling to flying 7,000 miles from home. Found out I love flying. I had never stayed away from family for two weeks straight. Found out it's nice to take a break. But most of all, I went from being a girl who had a huge heart but had no idea what to do with it to having found where my heart belongs. 

The children in Africa aren't just the sad little faces you see starving and crying on your television set. They are beautiful, bright eyed and big smiled children. Each one of them have their own personality like you and I. They are human like us all. They love to play and have your attention. If you aren't smiling around them then you aren't doing something right. Jaime and I flew to Asosa, Ethiopia for two special kids.

These two kids, Pearl and Bereket, were already a huge part of Jaime's life from past trips. I had heard so much about them. Her big eyes and his captivating smile. I hasn't met them yet so they were just kids in a story to me. That day we flew out to see them was pretty exciting for us both. Her getting to see the kids who never leave her heart and me getting to meet them. We walked to the orphanage and as we knocked on the gate you could peer through a little crack and see nothing but red sand and a few kids frozen with puzzled looks on their faces. But the Gate Opener, Pearl, was running. As soon as she opened it I knew exactly who she was. The big beautiful eyes gave it away. Then along came the handsome Bereket. Yet again, I knew exactly who he was. After spending three days with the five kids (others have to go unnamed due to Ethiopian law) I realized why I jumped off my comfort wagon and boarded Ethiopian Airline. 

Leaving this place was the worst goodbye I had ever faced. Even worse than waving goodbye to my dad as he headed two states away. I had formed a bond with Addis Ababa. A bond you wouldn't understand until you experienced it yourself. From the second you arrive to the second you leave, you are welcomed like it is your home. I often forgot I was in Africa. 

As you can tell, this trip meant a lot to me.  It changed who I was. I no longer complain "I'm hungry" or "My room is too small." When I lay down at night I don't think "Well tomorrow is school." I think "I miss them. I wonder if they are okay. If they are still there." I look forward to the day I get to see my little brother and sister again. They changed me into a more mature and understanding person. I have seen things most people would avoid. I long for this beautiful place.

I may have went a little overboard for just a school essay but my heart and soul is in that. I liked it and decided I would share. And I would love feedback :)